I still couldn't get used to calling her that, but I knew I'd haveto."Was it the same dream?"I nodded. It was always the same dream."This can't go on," said Carol, "you need professional help." A child psychologist won't do any good," I sniffled. "We couldn't tellhim what he'd need to know to be able to help, that I'm not the littlegirl I appear to be. Tomorrow may be my fourth birthday, but I'm thirtyyears old." I hoped that after the funeral, things might improve for you."They hadn't. The funeral was four months ago. Carol and I been there,dressed all in black, as the body of Officer Ray Peralta was lowered intothe ground. His fellow cops all offered their condolences, several ofthem kneeling down and hugging me, none of them knowing it wasn't theircolleague in that casket but our daughter, Eloise. Carol's face was amask of grief, but at least the dark glasses hid her eyes. I had topretend a certain level of incomprehension, the small child not reallyunderstanding that her Daddy. Usne pink legging ke sath yellow t-shirt pehni thi. Pink leggings mein uski jaangho ki poori shape dikh rahi thi, aur woh bahut sexy lag rahi thi. Main jaanti thi, ki aaj Naresh usko dekh kar apne aap ko rok nahi payega. Fir maine Naresh ko phone kiya.Main: Hello.Naresh uncle: Hanji meri sexy jaanu.Main: Aaj Ghosh Babu ghar par nahi hai.Naresh uncle: To main aa jau?Main : Haa meri jaan, aa jao.Naresh uncle: Heena to hogi hi waha?Main: Haa hai, lekin woh so gayi hai. Kyuki maine uske khaane mein neend ki dawayi mila di thi.Naresh uncle: Matlab aaj main uske sath bhi maza kar sakta hu?Main: Haa meri jaan, jitna chaaho maza kar sakta hu.Naresh uncle: Theek hai, main abhi aata hu.Fir 10-minute mein Naresh uncle ne mere ghar ki bell bajayi. Maine darwaza khola, aur unko ghar ke andar le aayi. Woh aaj bahut khush dikh rahe the, to maine unse poocha-Main: Kya baat hai? Aaj bade khush dikh rahe ho?Naresh uncle: Jis jism ko choone ke liye main kab se tadap raha tha, aaj uska maza lene ko.
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